So day 1 - I should be pumped! Ready to kick it - right???
I sure was! For the first half of the day anyway; then it began to drag. I felt like I was never going to get to my boxing class and by the time it came around I had argued with my other half and I just wanted to lock myself away and cry.
Then I realised I had splattered pumpkin soup all over my work out top - nothing else to change in to so I got out the wet cloth and fixed that.
Then I couldn't find my heart rate monitor and still all I wanted to do was cry. I kept telling myself just get in the car and go for a drive. Make yourself feel better.
Also there a couple of skinny minnie young girls (prob 18-20) in the boxing class who like to stare at me and giggle behind their hands at me. (This is not just paranoia but I have chosen to ignore them.) The last thing I wanted to do was burst in to tears while exercising in front of them.
So I had every reason "in my mind" not to go. I walked out the door with everything I needed to go to the gym while thinking in my head I am just going to go for a drive, maybe get a coffee and take some time out for me.
But somehow I couldn't drive past the gym, I found myself in the car park and still dragging my feet - I walked in. Encouragingly, there were some brand new people there that I was able to encourage and I made the effort to chat with an older lady there. My heart was still not in it. I still wanted to walk away.. but I didn't.
I worked #@*& hard! I burnt 713 Calories in just under an hour and when I noticed the girls having their usual giggle I just worked harder.
NOBODY OR ANYTHING is going to stop me from getting to where I want to be. I will not let my emotions get in the way, I will not let other people's attitudes get in the way and I will not give up.
I have a size 16 t-shirt waiting for me with Never, ever, ever give up on it - and that is what I'll be doing!! I won't be wearing it for long though, because I'll be reaching for the Size 14 top next!!