Sunday, November 7, 2010

Rd3 Wk 7 - FAIL

Nope. Didn't do it. Not happening.

Food out the window - Exercise out the window. Care factor out the window and I can't get it back. I have officially given up on myself.

I feel so isolated and alone and I just don't function that way. I need to be with and around people. I need to feel like I am contributing something to society. I need to have friends... and it's just not happening.

Since I moved - I am out of sight, out of mind for my old friends. And I don't even have new friends.....

My study isn't working out. My work isn't working out. I do both of these things from home - BY MYSELF. At the moment I am just a voice in cyberspace and not even a very loud one....

There is more doubt in my head than ever - and not just about 12WBT, but about every little thing in my life.

I am so tired of doing everything on my own and in my own head. Ironically - even this blog.

I'm not asking for pity - I just needed to shout it out to the universe and listen to it quietly echo in the vast darkness.....

LOL! I am such a drama queen. : ) But that's just the way I roll.


  1. Hi Lan,

    Sorry to hear you're having such a tough time of things all around. I don't have any great words of wisdom as I'm just starting to turn things around myself. My only advice would be to take things one day a time. I don't have much of a social life (besides online) but I'm happy being a homebody. But if you need people then you need to find them. School, gym, another hobby? Put your thinking cap and get out there and meet some people. If not, develop more online friendships. Some of my best friends are those I know online - and only a few I've met in real life.


  2. Hey Libby.

    Moving around so much with the RAAF I've generally coped not having friends around but I was lucky to spend 3 1/2 years in Adelaide with my best buddies EVER (all 5 of them) in our last posting. Now that I have had a taste of that - I miss them terribly.... I am feeling better today. Had a good talking to myself last night. Skipping work today, getting my house in order and getting my head in order. Glad you are turning things around tho!
    Way to go, Libby!

  3. I am here.....and I hear you. (even if I am a few days behind.) I am really looking forward to our adventure in Sydney......

  4. Thank you Lynda. I am really looking forward to the trip to Sydney too. I can reassure you that I'll be leaving my cares and worries behind and just be having fun! ; )